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Sunday October 28, 2012:

After a perfect morning and afternoon, someone just ruins the whole entire day........ It's someone close to me. Here i go ranting: This person does not think what she says at all! The only thing that comes out of her mouth are negative stuff. She makes you feel stupid all the time. She's always correct or right! For example, i have some beauty marks on my face and she told me that if she were a guy on a bus and saw me she would go "Whoa! Ewww..." *disgusted look* Inside of me just got heated. I felt mad and even more insecured about my face. I couldn't believe she would say that to her own sister! That's right! Mee!!! Mean Mee!!!

Addicted

I've recently found this lovely youtube channel! Her name is Rihannon and she's so cute and eccentric. Check her out!

Im ready for fall...

Yesterday, i went to the thrift store and bought 2 scarves and a chair for my desk. Here's how i wear one of the scarves :)

Must Listen

Get lost in it..................

Thongs and being hungry and bummed out...

Blehhhh why me???

Well today wasn't a good day to bother me. Adam Green would know haha. Well, today went like this:

Couldn't make lunch because my chicken breast went bad and my pork also went bad :( So i made pb&j and took a tangerine and nature valley bar for lunch to go. Textile lab was okay...i meant boring. It felt gross wearing the sticky goggles :/ But oh well,safety comes first! Left to the Student Community Center to use the restroom because Rock Hall's restroom is really nasty and dirty! oh i think Meow is here...i hear her coming, maybe. Anyway, i printed out my schedule for work and noticed that i only have 12 units! Turns out the administrator dropped my calculus class because i didn't take the math placement exam. Sooooo sad and mad at the math department. Long story of why i didn't take the math placement exam...i didn't know that's why! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!! That COMPLETELY ruined my day :'( oh well, i guess it was meant to be, right? *nervous chuckle* While i was taking the bus i saw a white guy wearing slippers and thought to myself would it be offensive if i said "Hey, i like your thongs" hahaha im using the Aussie slang for slippers :p The pb&j sandwich didn't fill me up...well of course! should of made two sandwiches...i felt like those stuck up IB kids eating their sandwiches made by their mom :p This story isn't in order, just letting you know...Since i don't have calc anymore, i don't have a midterm this weds! Yay and nay of course...well what a bummed day for me :/ 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

No Happy Ending

In Eugene O’Neil’s tragic play Long Day’s Journey Into Night, he writes about a family that is torn apart by lies and secrets. In Sarah Kane’s grotesque play Blasted, she presents three characters that are distant from reality. Both tragedies are very similar in that they show the downfall of the characters and also give a glimpse of the unrealistic world they live in. Both O’Neil and Kane explore the theme of violence, drugs, and alcohol in cyclical settings to emphasize the loss of rational human beings.

In Long Day’s Journey Into Night, the Tyrone family can be seen as dysfunctional because each family member has a problem.  James Tyrone, the father, is stingy and greedy with his money and stresses the importance to be ambitious. Mary, the fragile mother, has a secret addiction to morphine, ever since her husband did not want to pay for professional medical service. Jamie Tyrone, the eldest son, dislikes the qualities of his father and acts in careless ways, such as wasting money on alcohol and women. Edmund Tyrone, the youngest son, is also an alcoholic and is diagnosed with consumption. All these flaws in each family member cause them to be distant and secretive from one another. In effect, they drift away from reality and avoid their problems.

Mary often talks about her dreams of becoming a nun or a famous pianist. She is sensitive and has an “unaffected charm of a shy convent-girl youthfulness she never lost,” (O’Neil 13) that seems to prevent her to forget about the past and move on. She lives in a fantasy world. As for the men in the family, they are affected by Mary’s drug addiction and Edmund’s consumption problem, but do not communicate the problems directly to Mary. The men keep things from Mary and allow her to “go on kidding herself” (O’Neil 30), which increases her distant from reality. The more morphine Mary takes, the more she cannot forget the past. She cannot seem to focus on the present because she has many regrets. Similarly, Cate from Blasted is naïve and innocent to understand the issues that surround her. She looks at things positively and plays around with Ian about shooting her without realizing the horrors outside of the hotel. Furthermore, her optimism makes her vulnerable to please Ian; when Ian asks Cate why she came to the hotel, she replied that “You (Ian) sounded unhappy” (Kane 23) and would listen to Ian when she leaves him sexually in pain. This shows that Cate forgets about what she believes in or says and just listens to Ian to make him happy.

Besides Mary’s drug addiction and being oblivious to family issues, the men also have an addiction to alcohol. The men go out and get drunk while Mary is alone at home most of the time, which leaves her to do drugs.  It shows that alcohol is more important than staying home with their lonely mother. In Act III, Tyrone seems to care more about his whiskey than confronting or helping Mary with her addiction. He “drinks his drink…scowls at his wife” (O’Neil 118) and ignores her complaint and rants about the past. As for Edmund, he gets drunk for it allows him to avoid family problems. Also, he sees alcohol like getting lost in the fog and by the ocean. He gets drunk for it reminds him of “wanting to be alone with myself in another world where truth is untrue and life can hide from itself” (O’Neil 133). This explains that Edmund has does not want to face or accept the truth about his dysfunctional family. He spends his time at sea alone or gets drunk for it takes him to a world free of worries. As for Kane’s play, Ian drinks gin and smokes cigarettes to feel better about himself, and to release anxiety. He drinks excessively for it “won’t make any difference” (Kane 11) because he is going to die soon. With alcohol and drugs, Ian is able to suppress the fact that he is dying slowly. Ironically, he seems careless about dying, but in the end of the play, he becomes scared of dying and asks Cate to not leave him.  Kane shows the effect of how alcohol causes the mind to act foolishly when Ian takes his health for granted. As for the soldier, the murder of his girlfriend, Col, leads him to commit atrocious acts. He has been traumatized by the murder and violence that he does not feel any sympathy when murdering children and women. He has become obsessed with vengeance that he does not act rationally.     

In addition, the settings of both plays do not change. The plot of O’Neil’s play only takes place in the Tyrone’s home. O’Neil develops repetitive problems and arguments by having the family come together in one setting. This technique also explains the unresolved issues among the family, making the play a tragedy. As for the setting of Blasted, it is taken place in the hotel room. The unchanging of the play emphasizes the character’s avoidance of reality outside of the hotel. They hide from what’s happening outside.  Both static settings serve as a place of action and unsettled disputes or problems.

The Bacchae Cast

In The Bacchae of Euripedes:  A Communion Rite by Wole Soyinka, the god of wine and theater Dionysus and the famous Theban seer Tiresias are two of the play’s intriguing character. In the beginning of the play, Tiresias is the first character to closely interact with Dionysus. The initial interaction between Dionysus and Tiresias is interesting, which is the reason why I chose the characters to focus. If I were the director of the play The Bacchae, I would cast British actor Sam Hazeldine as Dionysus and British actor John Hurt as Tiresias.

In the beginning of the play, the god Dionysus is situated within his mother tomb and looks down upon the smoke from his feet. He is portrayed as angry and disappointed in the people of Thebes for not worshipping him as a god. Also, the people of Thebes have disrespected Dionysus’ mother, Semele, by calling her slut. In the play, Dionysus is described as beautiful, mischievous, and playful. British actor Sam Hazeldine would make a perfect Dionysus. I imagine Dionysus as blond and muscular, yet has a slim look. Sam Hazeldine is also blond and quite muscular for the role. I can see Hazeldine wearing a tunic and a wreath around his long blond curls. These features create a godlike character. Furthermore, he is handsome as Dionysus is described as beautiful. Recently, I have seen the movie The Raven, which Hazeldine is revealed as the mad and playful editor/murderer of the movie. However, Hazeldine’s character Ivan is first portrayed as innocent, but transform into an evil and mischievous newspaper editor. From this observation, Hazeldine embodies frivolity and mischievousness just like Dionysus when he plays tricks on Pentheus. As for setting the stage, I would have Hazeldine standing on top of his mother’s tomb looking out to the city of Thebes in disappointment. Hazeldine would stand tall and his fists would curl in anger because of the ignorance and rudeness of the Thebans.

As for Tiresias, he is described as a wise old man and seer. When Tiresias is being taunted by the floggers in the beginning of the play, I imagine Tiresias as a dirty and disheveled man that has been totured by the floggers. He is also thin and weak and does not have much power over people. I believe that British actor John Hurt would be an excellent choice to portray wise old Tiresias. From watching John Hurt acting as the estranged and demented, yet intelligent Professor Oxley in the Hollywood movie Indian Joes and the Kingdom of Skull, Hurt can easily act the character of Tiresias. I see Tiresias as a frail and thin, old man. Professor Oxley is also very thin and speaks intelligently of his knowledge.  When Dionysus meets Tiresias, Dionysus demands Tiresias to dance, which he does. This reminds me of Professor Oxley aimlessly wandering around in the forest in the Amazon from the enemies. In a way, he seemed likey he was dancing because he was swirving in circles with the skull in his hands. As for stage setting, I would have the lights dim and a little bit of fog surrounding Tiresias and Dionysus. This makes it look like they are alone and away from everybody. It also makes the scene personal and intimate between the characters. I would have Hurt dressed up in a brown and dusty tunic due to the incident with the floggers. The character of Tiersias really reminds me of Hurt. After the meeting of Dionysus, Tiersias meets Cadmus. From there, I would have Dionysus disappear in the fog, but his voice still echoes to Tiersias to dance. As Cadmus enters the scene, the fog disperses. 

Weird, Strange, Bizarre, Awkward...

In Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka and The Intensive Care Unit by J.G Ballard, both authors situate their characters in a weird world where unusual things have taken place. In Kafka’s story, his main character is transformed into a beetle, who is soon neglected and isolated by his own family. In Ballard’s drama, the main character is a doctor who lives in a world where human contact is only possible through the media, such as camera and televisions. Kafka and Ballard use the idea of isolation and existentialism in their absurd drama in relation to the disconnection of the mind and body.

In Kafka’s story, the main character, Gregor is transformed into a beetle, yet he still thinks like a human. He begins to behave like an insect by climbing walls and such, but his mind is not in sync with his body. Gregor still wants the interactions with his family and connection with humanity. For example, Gregor likes the idea of moving his furniture out of his room to have more space to roam, but at the same time he does not want his mother and sister to take them out because the furniture has a lot of sentimental meanings to him, such as his desk reminding him of his school years. The furniture represents his memories as a human, which he dearly admires, but they seem to conflict with his body as an insect. In Ballard’s drama, the doctor falls in love and marries his patient, Margaret through television. The doctor’s relationship with his wife and children is also through television only. From this type of interaction, the doctor’s mind is only contacted with Margaret, not his body. This interaction through television prevents the doctor to have physical contact with Margaret. The doctor’s mind is able to communicate his thoughts and feelings to Margaret, but his body is far from her. This problem leads to the doctor feeling ambivalent about Margaret when he sees her in person. Although he thought of Margaret as beautiful and unique, his physical interactions with her in person does not match his thoughts about her on television.  He “failed to realize that this was the wife” in front of him outside of the house. Both the main characters’ minds are separated from their body. Gregor is torn between his emotions as a human and appearance as a bug. The doctor’s mind or televised perception of his wife does not reflect his physical relationship with his wife.

Furthermore, both protagonists are isolated from their own family. Gregor is forced to stay in his room, but watches them from a distance when his door is open. The doctor is by himself and is only able to see his family through television. They are both alienated from the world and physically disconnected from their family. When Gregor tries to interact with his family, the family is repulsed by his features and chases him back to his room. The doctor also faces this kind of rejection and repulsion by his own wife when he first physically meets Margaret. Margaret “turned and fled” from the sight of her husband of ten years. Eventually, both characters die because of their relationships with their family.  Gregor dies alone in his room of starvation and loneliness. The doctor is inflicted with pain by his own son and slowly dies on the floor. Gregor’s disconnection between the mind and body prevents him to communicate to his family. His isolation is caused by the conflict between his mental state and physical appearance. Their isolation deepens their separation of the mind and body that increases their uneasiness around their family.

In both stories, the characters are unusually calm to the irrational events that have taken place. They live in a different and new world. For example, the Samsa family does not question the metamorphosis of Gregor, nor do they seek any reasons or cure for Gregor. In The Intensive Care Unit, the characters are also at ease with the fact that communication and human interaction are only through television. They find no problem with this type of contact. This absurdity in Kafka’s and Ballard’s stories suggests that there is no rational structure in their society.  They live in an irrational and existentialist world where they do not try to make sense of events or explain the cause of situations. The idea of existentialism enhances their disconnection of the mind and body. They do not connect their minds to their bodies to make rational choices. They just live life as it is. The doctor and his family see each other with kindness and love through television, but when they all meet together in person they attack each other. Their televised mind and feelings do not sync with the way they are behaving in the living room.  In the end, the family becomes hostile and kills each other. As for Metamorphosis, Gregor cannot harmonize his mind and body, which troubles him to figure out his desires and to interact with his family. His family does not help him, but tries to pretend that nothing has happened. They have become so worried about their financial problems that they forget their physical relationship with Gregor.  The disconnection of the mind and body of the characters in both of the bizarre stories in an alien universe creates absurdity and isolation. 

Monkey See and Hear

Long, dangly legs and arms,

I knew he was a charm,

A smile or a frown,

But he is not feeling down,

With dark, blank, empty eyes,

Does he want to cry?

No, I want to cry.

He is soft, quiet, observant,

A friend, companion, not a servant,

He listens, sits, and hangs around,

His brown cushioned tummy round,

He is there for me,

A smile he brings to please.

This poem describes my miniature toy monkey that my boyfriend gave me. I am really interested in everything about monkeys because I believe that they are just happy animals that make me happy, too. This poem is about sadness, yet it is also about happiness. He brings me happiness because he looks funny with his crazy, long arms and legs, but reminds me of the people that I cannot be with.  Every time I look into his dark eyes I think of my family at home, my boyfriend who I constantly miss, and how different life would be if I were to live in a foreign country.

Personification is the poetic device that I use in the poem. I personify my monkey as a friend or companion that I see every day. He sits by my lamp in my dorm everyday and just watches me do homework or surf the internet. Sometimes I take a break and look at him and just think of the times that I spent with the ones that I love. I personify him as a person when I use the words “listens”, “sits”, and phrases such as “hangs around”. This creates an image of a person who is a friend who is also like a confidant, which I believe my monkey is. Every time I look into his black eyes, it makes me analyze my feelings about the things or people in my life. From there I feel so emotional to the point of crying. Also, he is more than just a toy, but companion that I often pour my thoughts and feelings to. He is there when I’m lonely, far away from friends and family.  There is repetition of “He is” because this monkey friend of mine exists.

Oh sweet nigthingale!

Moonlight- the light of the moon; the moon’s radiance (Oxford English Dictionary)

In the conversational poem “The Nightingale” by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, he stresses how people should not relate nightingales to melancholic things, but to joyous things. Also in the poem, he uses the word moonlight in an unfamiliar way. He uses moonlight in a positive and beautiful meaning; yet, the first thing that comes to my mind when I think of the word moonlight is creatures in the forest coming out to eat. I imagine animals roaming through the woods and casting eerie shadows. Personally, I think the moonlight is something mysterious with dark and ominous connotations. On the other hand, Coleridge uses the word moonlight and other words associated with it, such as moon, in a different meaning to create a sense of beauty, harmony, and romance.

Readers often relate the word moon or moonlight to something dark and evil. However, Coleridge uses it in a beautiful context. He changes the connotation of the word moonlight by associating it with the joyful nightingales. The image of birds responding, singing, and gazing to the moon makes the overall poem peaceful and calm. He combines the chirpy nightingales with the moonlight, therefore making the whole entire poem sweet and tranquil. Coleridge, therefore, relates the nightingales, symbolizing harmony and bliss, with the moonlight. He brings beauty and mystery to the poem by having nightingales sing to the moonlight.

In addition, the word moon, which relates to the word moonlight, is used several times in the poem. Its effect is that it creates a soothing sound like ooohh because of its o’s in the word. This makes the poem flow and smooth to read and to easily imagine nightingale warbling in the happy night. The nightingales are awake and sing merrily in the night, which the moonlight sooths the atmosphere by creating a harmonious tone to the poem. Furthermore, the word moonlight creates an image of rays of light shimmering on water or providing color to land, which generates a sentimental and romantic feeling to the air. The moonlight seems to make the dark night less scary. It fits perfectly in the poem because the moonlight provides a spotlight for the nightingale to sing. Moreover, it would be spooky to have birds singing in the dark, so having the nightingales sing in the moonlight creates a beautiful picture. In a certain way, Coleridge’s poem radiates, just like the moon, a kind of inspiration and peace to the reader.

Moi!

My name is Bao Yang. I am a freshman majoring in Textile and Clothing and French. I am from the boring town of Modesto, which is like an hour and a half from Davis. The title “Daydreamer” reflects who I am as a person. I tend to daze and come up with random things to talk about whenever I am bored or just have nothing to do. I daydream about certain things from problems in this messed up world to things like living on an island far away from society. Mostly, I daydream about what if situations and I just imagine myself living in a whole new different world. As for the URL name, I came up with a couple of titles for it but they were all unavailable. Anyhow, I decided to create a title related to literature and I could only think of Shakespeare at that moment. I wanted something catchy and that rhymes. For the design of the blog, I chose the simple layout because I thought that it would be convenient for the reader and I to simply read the blog without any distractions. Although, the design and color of the blog will change later because I am still in the process of figuring out how blogspot works. My vision for my blog is something mysterious and colors that are a bit gloomy because I believe that it would create a studious mood. As for my goals for the class, I am quite eager to read the books for English 3 because there is something that I will always learn from reading masterpieces from extraordinary writers. There are powerful messages from writers that I find by thinking deeply and analyzing their works. Therefore, I am looking forward to reading the texts and find some kind of treasure or revelation that would have an influence on me.